Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Please help me survive the day

I think I'm going to die. I have the flu - or at least the symptoms thereof and am currently feverish and sweating like a drag queen in line at an Army recruiting office. Bitch know she gonna get found out and won't get to see the pretty marines take their clothes off.

And I tried a new deli for lunch - girls, avoid turkey, cranberry and dressing sandwiches made by Cubans. If it don't come from your grandma, leave it at home! Lord. My head hurts, my stomach is doing a Flying Wallenda number and my eyes are crossing. I think I'm going to die. Ohhhhh. I have bad gas too.

These thin-blooded heifers keep the temperature in the office so hot. One turned it up to 78 degrees the other day. What is this? Egypt? Bring a sweater.

OK. Enough kvetching. I need to make a run to the bathroom before I throw up at the desk.


FARfetched said...

Sip Powerade or some other sport drink. I'm serious. But sip it. Let your stomach absorb it before it has a chance to rebel.

I had the flu a while back, did this, and bounced back very rapidly (none of the usual debilitation). You need to keep your fluids up, and the electrolytes will help keep your chemistry in balance.

Oh, and be sure to give it to all the people who give you grief at work. >:-}

spleeness said...

Oh no! This year's virus of misery has finally reached you. :(

I had this a couple months ago, my doc said this current strain is particularly virulent. You'll have to wait out its course but like the other commenter said, please drink & eat well.

I'd send you some chicken soup if I could.

Anonymous said...

My dear, "farfetched" is correct - drink, but drink slowly. You have a virus or food poisoning. I hope you are spending today at home resting, eating what's appealing (and available) and surfing when possible.

Please get well! This nasty bug just wants your time more than anything.

--A lurker from the Midwest

Julia said...

Have you ever had a (home-made) chicken broth that tasted so good that it almost felt orgasmic? Spoon by single spoon? I did. And I wish I could send you one over, too. *mmmm*

Anonymous said...

haven't heard from you, worried that you must be on your deathbed. Hang in there, 'k?

Glen said...

Hope you feel better soon!

Anonymous said...

did you survive?